October 29, 2010 Private Righteousness

I love today's Psalm for its applicability to my life, and it's ability to convict me when I need it!  I like it better in the hard-cover version I read most days:
"I will study the way that is blameless.  When shall I attain it?
I will walk with integrity of heart within my house;  I will not set before my eyes anything that is base." Psalm 101:2-3a NRSV

I've had years of practice at walking with the Lord at home-- from being a stay-at-home mom with three kids, to a work-at-home artist and writer.  Most of the time it is only the Lord who knows whether I have lived with integrity or not, although the fruit that I have borne, good or bad, all comes from this tree, grown at home.  Especially now, when the routine of raising children is over, there are lots of opportunities to waste time on worthless things.  Even though I'm careful not to get into evil things, I've discovered that even "harmless" things can steal the fruit I was meant to bear.  Since Jesus Himself is my righteousness, and the Way in which I'm to walk, staying in His presence is the only way I'm going to attain a useful and blameless life that pleases Him.  If I don't purposely set myself to live before Him at all times, I can easily drift (and occasionally do). 

As a person who spends a great deal of time alone, I've discovered that my worst enemy is myself.  I believe David realized this as well, and expressed it in this Psalm.  If I do nothing but look into the mirror, I'm going to have to deal with a person who could possibly: do something base, fall away from grace, be perverse of heart, think evil thoughts, secretly slander someone, have a haughty or arrogant attitude,  practice deceit or utter lies.  If I don't face up to the wickedness that dwells in my own selfish nature, I've already practiced deceit with myself.  So I'm with David-- I'm not going to wear a mask to fool myself (and I can't fool God, of course).  Instead, I'm going to get into conflict with all evil that thinks it wants to dwell in my private lodgings.  "Morning by morning I will destroy all the wicked in the land, cutting off all evildoers from the city of the Lord." vs 8 NRSV

And in the holographic sense, I'm the city of the Lord, and so are you.